Sunday, April 18, 2010

still screwed up!

Man has there ever been a shittier weekend?! Things started well enough but got bad SUPER fast!' I don't think I can ever change that!
I am stupid for a guy right now, but I am SOOOO on the fwb tip. Sucks so hard cause I like him more than that! But do you settle or do you you move on?! I don't want to move on I just want to go back to the way things were 3 short days ago.
Why does he think he can have it both ways? You can't sit there and say you don't like me then get jealous! You can't drop the L bomb on me when you're half asleep and then say I'm a bad person. Why say you're on the same page about not wanting drama and then be the one creating it?
I thought this guy was a good one but he is as damaged as I am and was SOOOO mean 2 me earlier (yep I know ur reading but wtf ever) I swear I am never gonna meet someone decent. One of the downfalls of being single. Starting over again!
Lyrics...." I want u 2 notice when I'm not around, you're so fucking special" Yep kittykats my headspace now!
How is someone so jealous of me when I suck so much? Why does the most awesome person on earth think I am worth the time? Am I not worth it because he thinks I'm not. Probably never gonna figure it out kittykats!
I guess the good news is I will have more time to write now, so we'll get back to where I was before. Going through my sordid past and trying to figure out where it all went wrong. I'm getting ready to dive into my second marriage which is currently ending. Maybe I've been putting it off on purpose because it's hard to think about all of it. You thought some messed up stuff happened before? Just wait...
As always thanks for listening and God bless!


  1. I personally say who cares what that dude thinks. If you don't love and respect yourself first, no one else is going to no matter how hard you beg them to love you. You are worth it, you do matter, and you need to stop talking to yourself the way you are. You wouldn't let anyone else treat you like that so why are you letting you?

  2. Meggy, SO much damage has been done to me, I don't know where to start! Trying to grab 5 minutes of happy out of a day but thinking I might deserve a bit more! For now keeping my focus on my kiddos, but wish I had something for ME! I am a grownup and sick of being alone babygirl!