Tuesday, August 7, 2012

End Of The Road

I started this blog a few years ago when I was freshly sober and not as confident about staying that way. I thought I would just start this little diary and no one would ever read it. Little did I know at the time that this little website would save my life more than once.

You guys have seen me through heroin addiction, rampant alcoholism, a string of terrible relationships, as well as a few bright moments sprinkled in along the way.

I have grown so much through your support and love. While rereading my blog recently I realized that I used it not only as a tool, but as a crutch as well. When life got a little too overwhelming I tended to retreat to cyberspace and just live virtually. Since I got out of prison, I have sensed a change in myself. I no longer spend hours on Facebook everyday out of loneliness. Somewhere along the way, I stopped worrying so much about perception and became totally OK with who Jamie is.

As most of you who know me irl are already aware of, a strange thing happened recently....

I had that minor flipout after getting released, but then I relaxed and flat out stopped worrying. I wasn't looking to be with anyone, then out of nowhere I fell in love with Shawn, one of my best friends of 16 years. We are engaged and super-happy, but guess what?

I DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO SHARE IT WITH THE WORLD!!!!!! This is my happiness and I have no desire to dissect and overanalyze it. I want to stop typing about life, and actually live it. I'm not afraid anymore.

I want to thank you guys once again for keeping me in good shape. You know where to find me kittykats, both my twitter world & my Facebook world. I'm not going to be OK, I'm going to be GREAT!

One last time.....