Sunday, May 23, 2010

My last blackout.....

Well today is day #1!
I did not fall of the wagon, more like I FACEPLANTED! I had 17 days off alcohol and met someone who messed me up sideways. So today I am getting sober again. I am coming off a 3 day blackout and have NO idea what happened!
Why do I abuse myself like I do? There must be deeper issues, but therapy is WAY too expensive!
I started this blog to work through my past, but the present is just as big of a nightmare! I am still sober and sick as all hell! So there will be no posting for at least a day, the shakes make it hard to type!
I hope this time it takes, pray for me please? Weird coming from a diehard agnostic, but if God can help? Would welcome it!
BTW gotta give a shout out to Abbey, who thinks I am interesting enough to write a paper about?!
As always thanks for listening and God bless!


  1. well babe this is one agnostic whose prayer was just answered...

  2. Still cheering for you. You can do this!

  3. I keep mentioning to you that most alcoholics find that that cannot quit by themselves. The way that worked for me and for many others was Alcoholics Anonymous - not just going to a few meetings but getting a good sponsor to help walk you through the 12 Steps.

    Remember that description of insanity - repeating the same actions and expecting different results. Admitting that you can't quit on your own is not a sign of weakness, it is a sign of admiting that you have a problem that you can't lick on your own.

    I know many people who have recovered, and some of them literally ended up living on the streets and lost everything, including their families, before figuring this out. I pray that you don't have to go that far.

    Many people have also found that that a 30 day in-patient treatment program can be very helpful as well.